Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
