remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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