Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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