Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
