I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize