Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
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