I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
