its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
