he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Randomize
