What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
