K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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