she was so not down for the gang bang
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize