Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
