Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
