i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Randomize
