just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Idk if I want to put a bra on
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
