So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Randomize
