Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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