Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
nutella sex= disaster
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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