You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
