"it" just moved
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Randomize