guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
