I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
