If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
