I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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