another moral hangover. fuck.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
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