where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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