Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
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