already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Sorry my hands just texted you
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
