why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
