I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Tell her she can't have a vagina
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
