Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
