Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
