Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Randomize
