Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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