Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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