I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
