did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
