wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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