hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
