She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
