You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
So much rum. So many feels.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
