wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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