if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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