You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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