As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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