She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
