I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
time to smoke my breakfast
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Will exercising make me less horny?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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