Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
she pinky promised me she was 18
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
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