Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
