the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
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