i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
